Tips for Staying Sane in Quarantine

Well, a friend and colleague wrote most of these, but I thought they were good for all of us to read and think about. This is a unique time, we get through it by taking one day at a time, and not letting the "what if''s" get to us.

Tips to stay motivated and in good head space while stuck at home…

1. Make your bed

Sticking to your usual morning routine helps to start the day in a sane way. Especially when you get that fear realization that you are stuck at home, doing what you normally do in the morning helps the brain.

2 .Plan a schedule for the day
Plan out your entire day. A routine will establish normalcy in this not-so normal time. This boosts productivity and sense of purpose.

3. Create a bright environment
Whatever space you work in or hang out the most in…do some redecorating! Good lighting, plants, candles, upbeat music, etc. You want a room that you look forward to being in. Make sure you keep it organized and de-cluttered as well.

4. Water, water, water
Stay hydrated, drink lots of water. Don’t just drink soda pop and coffee all day. Also, try your best to eat healthy and not carb load on junk.

5. Spend time outside
It’s easy to start thinking of the outside world as scary. It’s not. Get outside; walk around your yard, do some planting, go for a walk, go for a car drive (and get Starbucks drive thru). Even if it’s just a few minutes several times a day to be outside, breathe deeply and watch the clouds. You need oxygen! A buildup of carbon dioxide is not good for anxiety. Plus, it’s helpful to remember that life still exists, the world has not ended, and that you are still part of the human race.

6. Movement
Devote specific time in your daily schedule for physical activity. Stream an exercise video, do some yoga, walk up and down stairs, stretch. Get the endorphins flowing! You may not have control over some aspects of this world right now, but you have control over your muscles!

7. Practice mindfulness
Same as physical activity, devote some time every day to practice mindfulness. Keep your mind in the here and now – don’t worry about the future. Meditate, listen to a peaceful podcast or guided mediation, do the Hershey kiss trick, hyper focus on your senses around you, close your eyes and listen to music… BREATHE

8. Attitude check
We are human; you will have wonky emotions, feel overwhelmed. It’s okay to allow yourself a bit of a pity party. Know when you’ve had enough and it’s okay to disengage for a bit. But then give yourself an attitude check. I suggest at least once a day, check your attitude. Notice if your thoughts are positive or negative, notice if your body is relaxed or tense. Don’t beat yourself up for this…just notice it and then put energy into turning the ‘tude around.

9. Joy
This is a unique time, we will be telling stories soon about where we were during this crisis and all be wearing “we survived” t-shirts. Make the most of this!!! Try a project you’ve been meaning to do. Read that book you haven’t had time for. Spend quality/ creative time with your family. Cook and eat meals together. Binge watch movies from the 1980s. Write the next great American novel. The possibilities are endless! Finally, once a day do something joyful. Schedule it into your day. Having something positive and joy filled to look forward to in your day is so so important.

10. Spend time with God    Read the Bible, pray, worship, sit quietly before Him, go out an admire Nature, and BE THANKFUL!

credit given to Melissa Doucette, MA, LMFT

How Shall We Then Pray?

How Shall We Then Pray?

Here are 20 points that can help guide us in our prayers for the situation we are in. Remember

"The fervent, effectual prayer of a righteous person has great power in its effects!" (James 5:16)

I came back from Jamaica on Friday the 20th of March and everything had changed! The week before, everyone went to school, work, ate in restaurants, many went to church. Wow, what a drastic and sudden change.

Not since World War II has such a large thing happened to our country. 

God is shaking everything that can be shaken, so that what cannot be shaken might remain... (Heb. 12:26-27)

Coronavirus prayer points

When I was feeling powerless this morning, I read this great prayer list from Jen Pollock Michel and I remembered we have great POWER in prayer and being good neighbors right now! 

1. For the sick and infected: God, heal and help. Sustain bodies and spirits. Contain the spread of infection.

2. For our vulnerable populations: God, protect our elderly and those suffering from chronic disease. Provide for the poor, especially the uninsured.

3. For the young and the strong: God, give them the necessary caution to keep them from unwittingly spreading this disease. Inspire them to help.

4. For our local, state, and federal governments: God, help our elected officials as they allocate the necessary resources for combatting this pandemic. Help them to provide more tests.

5. For our scientific community, leading the charge to understand the disease and communicate its gravity: God, give them knowledge, wisdom, and a persuasive voice.

6. For the media, committed to providing up-to-date information: God, help them to communicate with appropriate seriousness without causing panic.

7. For consumers of media, looking to be well-informed: God, help us find the most helpful local information to equip us to be good neighbors. Keep us from anxiety and panic, and enable us to implement the recommended strategies, even at a cost to ourselves.

8. For those with mental health challenges who feel isolated, anxious, and helpless: God, provide them every necessary support.

9. For the homeless, unable to practice the protocols of social distancing in the shelter system: Protect them from disease, and provide isolation shelters in every city.

10. For international travelers stuck in foreign countries: God, help them return home safely and quickly.

11. For Christian missionaries throughout the world, especially in areas with high rates of infection: God, provide them with words of hope, and equip them to love and serve those around them.

12. For workers in a variety of industries facing layoffs and financial hardship: God, keep them from panic, and inspire your church to generously support them.

13. For families with young children at home for the foreseeable future: God, help mothers and fathers to partner together creatively for the care and flourishing of their children. For single mothers and fathers, grow their networks of support.

14. For parents who cannot stay home from work but must find care for their children: God, present them with creative solutions.

15. For those in need of regular therapies and treatments that must now be postponed: God, help them to stay patient and positive.

16. For business leaders making difficult decisions that affect the lives of their employees: God, give these women and men wisdom, and help them to lead self-sacrificially.

17. For pastors and church leaders faced with the challenges of social distancing: God, help them to creatively imagine how to pastor their congregants and love their cities well.

18. For college and university students, whose courses of study are changing, whose placements are cancelled, whose graduation is uncertain: God, show them that while life is uncertain, their trust is in you.

19. For Christians in every neighborhood, community, and city: May your Holy Spirit inspire us to pray, to give, to love, to serve, and to proclaim the gospel, that the name of Jesus Christ might be glorified around the world.

20. For frontline health care workers, we thank you for their vocational call to serve us. We also pray:

God, keep them safe and healthy. Keep their families safe and healthy- help them to be knowledgeable about the diagnosis and treatment of this disease, as well as the changing protocols.-help them to stay clear-minded in the midst of the surrounding panic -deliver them from anxiety for their own loved ones (aging parents, children, spouses, roommates).

God, give them compassion for every patient in their care- provide for them financially, especially if they fall ill and are unable to work.- help Christians in health care to exhibit extraordinary peace, so that that many would ask about the reason for their hope. Give them opportunities to proclaim the gospel.

God, we trust that you are good and do good. Teach us to be your faithful people in this time of global crisis. Help us to follow in the footsteps of our faithful shepherd, Jesus, who laid down his life for the sake of love. Glorify his name as you equip us with everything needed for doing your will. Amen.

Burnout? Me? Part 4

The final installment in my 4 part series on Burnout. Pastors? Doctors? Counselors? Teachers? Lawyers? Nurses? Caregivers, Missionaries? I hope this has been helpful. At the end I put a poem/hymn that has been really a blessing to me; a copy of it is displayed in each of my offices. Enjoy!

10. Guilt. How do we live in a world where there is such an imbalance of resources? There is great disparity, and we need to come to grips with that in order not to feel guilty.

 One effect of guilt is that it can affect any authentic connection between people. We tend to purposefully diminish ourselves in an unsuccessful attempt to connect with those less fortunate than us. “Why can I buy some new shoes when they don’t even have a house?” we think. Or we downplay that we had a nice, fun weekend, knowing that our clients did not. 

Guilt is one of the strongest signs of trauma response. Yet if we yield to it, it blocks our ability to be present with those who need us. We must overcome this false sense of guilt, and take in the beauty, and fresh sense of rejuvenation around us. We’ll need it to bring some sense of nourishment and care to others. 

Ps 32:10 “Many are the sorrows of the wicked, but he who trusts in the Lord, lovingkindness shall surround him”

Ps. 31:23 “The Lord preserves the faithful, and faithfully recompenses the proud doer.”

Ps. 84:11 “No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.”

11. Fear. Fear is a natural and healthy response to much of what we witness. But, too often we don’t acknowledge it, because it makes us feel so vulnerable. It may make us uncomfortable to discover that we have much in common with our clients, who are also fearful. 

Do we disconnect from our fear because it reminds us of the fragility of our lives? When we acknowledge our fear, we have the opportunity to deepen our compassion. When we overcome the fear of dying, it helps us embrace the preciousness of life, and live in a more loving way. 

Is 41:9,10 “You are my servant, I have chosen you and not rejected you. Do not fear, I am with you, do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Ps 34:7 “The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear Him and delivers them.” 

Phil 3:13,14 “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

I Jn. 4:4 “You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world.”    

12. Anger and Cynicism. Anger is a common feeling that we get when confronted with injustice. But, the majority of people have not been raised with good skills for managing anger. No wonder there are so many anger management classes and groups being offered!

 We need to learn what to do with our anger to be healthy individuals. We need to be comfortable with our anger or our clients will find it impossible to process their anger with us. Cynicism is one way that many people deal with their anger: it’s a sophisticated way of managing it, and often it is witty, quick, sharp, easy to laugh at. 

Yet underneath is bitterness, and that needs to be handled with care.

 Bitterness is the cocaine of emotions. Better to vent, safely express the anger (not hurting anyone), and move on, than sit and hold on the your anger. Find a friend who will listen, not try to fix you, and share what's on your heart.

“Be angry but do not sin, don’t let the sun go down on your anger.”Eph. 4:26

“They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed.” Ps. 34:5

“For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this, that one dies for all, therefore all died; and He dies that they who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died and rose again on their behalf.” II Cor. 5:14,15

This is the poem/hymn that I never get tired of reading: 

He gives more grace when the burdens grow greater,

He sends more strength when the labors increase;

To added affliction He adds His mercies,

To multiplied trials His multiplied peace.

When we have exhausted our store of endurance,

When our strength has failed ‘ere the day is half done,

When we reach the end of our hoarded resources,

Our Father’s full giving is only begun.

His love has no limit, His grace has no measure,

His power no boundary known unto men;

For out of His infinite riches in Jesus

He gives and gives and gives again.

                                                        Annie Johnson Flint